A Kayleigh Moment

Friday was a long day. It wasn't a bad day, just long. The kids went to friends' houses to spend the night instead of coming here  Jeff was at work all day, then came home for about 30 minutes before heading out for a balloon flight. So, it was Kayleigh and me, all day. I was already pretty tired and hormonal on top of that before we ever got to bedtime!!  So, once I FINALLY got to bed about midnight, I was ready for sleep. Didn't happen. Kayleigh started crying at 12:30.  I went up to her room and rocked her to sleep, lay her in the bed, she woke up and cried. I rocked her, lay her down, she cried. Rocked her, lay her down, she stared back at me as I sat by the crib. I sat there wondering, "What was I thinking when I started a second adoption? I am barely managing this one right now. How am I going to manage a second one if she doesn't sleep either?"  Then I rocked Kayleigh some more, lay her down, she stared. Somewhere in there I gave her a dose of Melatonin.  At 1:30 a.m., I gave up. If it had been 4:30, 5:00, 5:30, I would have just put her in the bed with Jeff and me, but it's just 1:30. So, what am I going to do? I decided Kayleigh and I would get in Marissa's bed since she was not at home. I scooped Kayleigh up out of bed, stomped downstairs to get my pillow and stomped back upstairs to Marissa's bed. By the time I got us both settled in the bed, I was tired, frustrated, working on a little bit of anger and I had added guilt in there for being a bad momma and not having more compassion for my child, who, for whatever reason, cannot go to sleep. I turned over on my side with my back to Kayleigh because the tears were coming.  I lay there and cried and let the frustration, anger, and guilt wash away.  And while I'm lying there crying, my 2 year old Chinese blessing scooted a little closer to me and started patting me on the shoulder....

So, how does the story end? I rolled over, scooped her up in my arms and cuddled her next to me, cried a little more, and she eventually fell asleep.  Somewhere along the way, I fell asleep, too. When we woke up this morning, we started a new day, and this momma can only hope that tonight is a better night.

Two Interviews in One

We had two wonderful things happen today, basically both at the same time.  First, we had our 12 month post placement interview for Kayleigh's adoption.  At the same time, we had our 1st of 4 interviews for our home study for the 2nd adoption.  I had hoped this would be possible, but I was thinking it would happen at the second interview. Our social worker contacted us and asked if we could do it today. Of course! We have also learned we will not have to do the online Hague Training (21 hours of online reading of articles and watching of videos) This saves us $195.  We do not have to do the adoption discussion questions, the adopting trans-racially/internationally questions, or the complete autobiographies.  This is literally HOURS of writing and answering questions.  I handed over a stack of papers to our social worker; we have already been fingerprinted and filled out Child Abuse and Neglect Forms. We are still a long way from going to China to bring home Kayleigh's sister, but we are moving right along. Gotta love it!

Our first fund raiser will be June 23. So many people have been so generous in bringing us their stuff, we are going to have our first yard sale on that day.  We already have a couch, loveseat, 2 entertainment centers, books, lots of children's books, board games, purses and bags, kitchen items, home decor items, lots of queen sheet sets (in very good condition, I might add), some teacher things that I have cleaned out and too many other things to mention. I am still pricing and sorting items. If you have items you would like to donate, we will continue to accept items for this yard sale until June 15.  That will give me time to sort and price. If you have other things you would like to donate later, we plan to have another yard sale some time in the fall. Thanks to the generosity of Billy and Christy Taylor, we plan to have the yard sale at Home Town Lenders on North Parkway next to Flint River Baptist Church. We will start around 8 and go until we drop, probably.  If you do not consider yourself a yard sale shopper, tell your friends who are!